My Theology/Religion Book TBR

 This year I made the goal to read 10 Orthodox books that would either relate to theology, saints, or some other way. Because I want to makes sure this goal actually happens I made a list of the 10 books I need to read. I am allowed to read other books in addition to these 10 but I have to read these 10. I find when I make a list and am specific with the titles I am more likely to actually complete.

So far I have read 3 of my goal books and am in the middle of another of my books. I have been going through a bit of a reading slump with COVID going on right now. But here is my list of 10 Orthodox books to read. I will note which ones I have completed and which one I am in the middle of reading. I might give some information on why I picked some of the books as well.

1. Grand Duchess Elizabeth of Russia by Lvubov Miller
I actually really need to get moving on reading this one as I have actually borrowed it from a friend. I always feel nervous borrowing books from people as I am such a mood reader and I feel nervous when I take too long to work through a book.

2. Reclaiming the Atonement: An Orthodox Theology of Redemption by Patrick Henry Reardon -Currently reading
This one has been on my TBR for a while and I was first drawn to it as I am still working through gaining a deeper understanding of how the Orthodox understand atonement and redemption and how it differs from the western understanding. I highly recommend this book so far from what I have read which I am about 80% through. I also ended up purchasing more of Reardon's books because I enjoy is very in-depth but at the same time accessible writing.

3. Bread & Water, Wine & Oil: An Orthodox Experience of God by Meletois Webber
So part of why I selected this one is because I was able to purchase it on audible for an audiobook. I try to either listen to church music on my way to services of a theology book. I also have been experimenting with if listening to theology books will help me to read more of them. I was intrigued by the description of this book however as I am always looking to better understand how Orthodox views of God differ from other Christian views.

4. Orthodox Worship: A living Continuity with the Synagogue, the Temple, and the Early Church -Finished
I got this one as it was recommended to me by Audible but I really was interested by it because ever since I read Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist (Catholic author but so much good material) I have been interested in understand the Jewish origins of Orthodox theology and practice. I feel like I need to reread this book actually as I do not think I fully processed all of the information in the book.

5. When the Church Was Young: Voices of the Early Fathers
Another Audible selection but I recently saw Hank Hanigraf did a podcast on this book so now I am extra intrigued by it. I will say that I am interested in gaining a better understanding of the early church and the theologians of the time.

6. At the corner of East and Now: A Modern Life in Ancient Christian Orthodoxy by Frederica Mathewes-Green - Finished
This one I selected mostly because I find Mathewes-Green to bean and easy to read author and I wanted something a little more soft and easy to read. Perhaps a bit less hard-hitting than other books on my list. It was also on Audible and the author was also the narrator which was very enjoyable.

7. Everywhere Present: Christianity in a One-Storey Universe 
This one I selected because it was on Audible. I can't remember if there was any other reason for selecting this book but I am interested in reading it.

8. The Orthodox Church by Kallistos Ware
My parents read this book when we became Orthodox and I have wanted to read it for a while and it is a bit of a classic in the Orthodox world but I have not gotten around to it so this year will be the year that I read it. I even ordered my own copy to annotate from Powell's bookstore.

9. Resurrecting Easter: How the West Lost and the East Kept the Original Easter Vision by John Dominic Crossan & Sara Crossan - Finished
So I purchased this book from Bookoutlet when I found it accidentally and I was very interested to read a non-Orthodox person's view on Western versus Easter Pascha/Easter. This book also focuses on religious art history which I was very intrigued by. I will say that there were some interesting tidbits in it about the history of how the Resurrection is portrayed. I would recommend this book.

10. Christ in the Psalms by Patric Henry Reardon
I selected this one originally because of the author and it seemed a good one from my reading list, however, after reading his other book I am even more excited to read this one. I am also intrigued by it more now having read bits and gained a better understanding of Christ being in the Psalms and the Orthodox Church's relationship to the Psalms. I am planning to read through the book of Psalms while reading this book as well.

What are some of your reading goals? Do you make specific goals with a specific list of books or do you make a goal and then go without a plan.

Liturgical Calendar

With everything that has been happening with COVID-19 in the world, it has highlighted even more how important the structure of a liturgical service and calendar are in providing stability.

I have generalized anxiety that has gone up and down over the years but I have noticed it gets worse when my life lacks structure and stability. Such as when I worked a job that had very inconsistent shift times week to week. However, I have always held on to the fact that when I go to an Orthodox church service I know the structure of the service and what will happen. I am familiar with the hymns and prayers I feel a sense of peace, comfort, and stability with this. Not only with the services themselves, but also with the liturgical calendar. It is a predictable structure of the year. I know when feast days are, when fasting periods are, and particular saint's days. I appreciate also the level of structure that happens in monasteries and how they structure regular prayer time, while not something that I as a layperson have used or implemented I appreciate the daily structure that it can provide.

What amazes me even more than just the peace and comfort that the liturgical structure and calendar provide for me personally is how it has impacted communities in the past. I took a Medieval Christianity class in undergrad and my professor talked about how churches and monasteries would ring bells during services to let people know they were being prayed for while they were out working. This would have been so powerful to think about how others are praying for the life of the world even when you cannot but also provides a kind of schedule structure to the day and the community. Feast days also would have played an important role in communities and church parishes were a center for village life. I can only imagine how in the Medieval period when things were chaotic the kind of peace and comfort liturgical structure brought to people.

Lastly, when I participate in a liturgical calendar and structure I feel strongly that I am not alone. There are so many other people involved in that same service in the past, present, and future. Which is part of Orthodox theology that liturgy takes place outside of space and time.

Much love and prayers for you all

Close Friendship

A close friend is so very dear and important. The connection and relationship can feed a soul. I have found friendship to be incredibly meaningful and something that has kept me going. I have found support and also someone who will listen to me and tell me when I need to chill out.

I always wanted a really close friend that I would talk to every day and feel deeply connected with. I had it for a little when I was a young child but then that friend and I went our separate ways. I didn't meet my now close friend until I was a first-year in college. We both are a bit unclear as to what exactly is the moment we connected but at one point we started talking very frequently. We then also became inseparable and were always doing things together.

I also have found that my closest friends are diverse in terms of religion. Some are atheists and non-Christians or a different Christian. I have deeply valued these differences of faith as a way for me to grow and as opportunities to learn but I also knew I wanted a close friend who shared my faith. Then my best friend became an Orthodox Christian and is now also my godsister and that has been an immense blessing. It is incredibly wonderful to share my faith with someone so close to me. We have been able to have theological discussions and share ideas. We also have both been in choir.  As Anne of Green Gables put it she is my "bosom friend".

I have deeply enjoyed our close friendship both in a spiritual and physical sense. But now things are changing, my dear friend has had to move 2 hours away for a new job. It isn't horribly far away but we can no longer see each other every day if we wish too. Visits will require a bit more planning and preparation. I am so very thankful though to live in this modern day and age where we have the technology. We are able to call and text each other every day to stay in contact. This is a new phase for our 7th year of friendship and while I mourn the change I also am looking forward to what is to come.

Saint Xenia

Saint Xenia of Petersberg lived in Russian in the 18th century. She was widowed at a young age of 26. In her grief, she distributed all her possessions to the poor and took up the holy life. After her husband's death, she centered her life around God and turned to him for all protection and comfort. She placed the kingdom of heaven before all earthly things. Many people sought to receive blessings from her and mothers always wanted her to kiss their children. She is also said to have had the gift of clairvoyance. She departed this life at the age of 71.

Many people pray to Saint Xenia for things related to marriage, work, homelessness, missing children, and a spouse.

I have given credit to Saint Xenia's prayers for many of the work and job opportunities I have had in my life. Whenever I have been struggling with finding a job or trying to decide if I should take a position or not I pray to her and ask for her intercessions.

Saint Xenia is commemorated on September 11th.

Spiritual in School: Religion Minor

A hymn by Proclus that I used in my paper.
It is in the book Religions of Late Antiquity

I have a religion minor, which essentially means that I took 4 religion classes, two about christian religions and two on other religions. However, the two classes on other religions were Sex & the Hebrew Bible and Religions of Late Antiquity so they both relate to Christianity. Both my major papers and research projects related to Christianity in those classes. I know many people stereotype religion classes or have the experience of taking religion classes and losing their faith or leaving their religion because of it. However, that was not my experience. I actually found that the religion classes complimented my faith or helped me in times when I was struggling in faith.

When I took my first religion class it was Early Christianity and I read so many works such as the Martyrdom of Polycarp and others that are important religious documents. It was uplifting for my faith to read those and to study them. While I may not agree with everything my religion professors say I still have gained something positive.

The Sex & the Hebrew Bible class helped me in a time when I was really struggling with misogyny in religion. particularly as relates to the Adam and Eve story. When my professor spent a whole week going over different interpretations in the assigned reading and in class for the creation story and the story of the fall, it just helped me to realize that it is not as sexist as people will interpret it. It is hard to describe how studying it in my class made me feel okay in my faith and I was no longer troubled about it in my mind.

This past school year in  my Religions of Late Antiquity class I wrote a paper comparing two hymns to the Virgin Mary my Ambrose of Milan and Proclus of Constantinople and how they were responding to the heresies in their community( Arianism & Nestorianism). I wrote this around Christmas and after studying the hymns and then singing the hymns for the Nativity in church I felt like I had a deeper understanding of the theology of the Nativity hymnography. I saw the same arguments that Ambrose and Proclus were making. In my Medieval Christianity class we took a field trip to an Orthodox Monastery, which is self explanatory as to the significance for me of that.

All of this is to say that what you get out of your religion classes is up to you. I felt prepared mentally for how those classes could challenge my faith and I have been so surprised with how much they have actually strengthened my faith.

Love and Blessings

Spiritual in School: Wearing a Cross

My cross and medallion of the Theotokos

One of the things that I have come to do while in college is to wear my cross and now a medallion of the Theotokos every day. I didn't wear a cross every day because I only had my baptismal cross, which is not the highest quality of cross so I was afraid it would fall apart and wear out. Also, it is gold and I am not big on wearing gold every day. It just is not practical and doesn't feel humble to me the way silver does. That might just be in my head though.

I attended a Lutheran-affiliated University that is very liberal and social justice oriented. I love the school. When I started wearing the medallion most people would ask me about it and say how beautiful it was. I was then able to talk about it and explain it to people. Everyone found it interesting and such. I have never had a negative experience wearing it at my school. I think it also offers an opportunity to talk about my faith if people ask questions.

I will admit I have been nervous wearing this for job interviews and Americorps interviews. However, I have not found it to be a problem and no one has made a point to tell me that wearing it would be a problem. I do live in the Pacific Northwest which may be part of the more accepting attitude.

Thank you for reading have a wonderful day.

Valentine's Day for me

My family after being baptized and taking communion for the first time. :) 

Valentine's Day is the anniversary of when my family and I were baptized and chrismated into the Orthodox Church. It was Forgiveness Sunday and the beginning of lent as well. It was overwhelming and incredible.

This year is the 7th anniversary and I have grown in my faith and my understanding of the church. What I most love is how my participation on the liturgy and life of the church has grown.

The blessing of the waters for baptism

I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine's day and celebrate those you love. 

Spiritual in School: Fasting on a Campus

So first of all story time about the picture above. I got a new vegetarian cookbook and was flipping through it to mark recipes that sounded interesting. I notices that some were marked fast and my brain immediately thought it mean fast friendly for orthodox. After a few minutes I realized that it actually was referring to cooking time. I told my closest friend(who is not orthodox but well aware of it) and she called me a nerd. :)

Fasting on a campus can be a struggle. Vegetarian options can be sparse and hard to find, let alone vegan options. I do live at home so I can for the most part provide my own food for breakfast and lunch at school and on occasion buy lunch and/or breakfast. There have been many moments during lent or nativity fast that I stared at the menu boards and struggled to figure out which would be the best of the 2 vegetarian options. To be honest I am not sure I can provide any good advice for someone who lives on campus as I eat pretty much my own food during fasting seasons. One of my other struggles is living in a family where there are health concerns and not everyone can fast in the same way. So the meals we eat together(mostly dinner) do not follow the fast in exactly the way I want to fast. But at this moment I chose to practice being thankful for the food my parents are giving me and that I have parents who are willing to give me food for free while a young adult in college.

But I can tell you that one thing that I struggle with is coffee. I love coffee. It is hard to drink a latte with soy milk rather than my favorite 2%. So I have found that what is best is for me to bring black tea to school. I prefer black tea with milk and sugar but I can drink it with just sugar(or no sugar) and it is not as difficult as a soy latte. Also it can save me some money. That is my one fasting tip. Drink tea instead of coffee. Also eat a lot of vegetables for lunch. I do recommend making overnight oatmeal for breakfast as you can take that to school and I can change between regular milk and almond milk.

My best advice is to do what you can and to follow the spirit of the fast and to also attend church during a fast. I would also recommend talking to your parish priest about what would be best for you to do.

Much Love

Spiritual in School: The College Job

a picture from when I worked for catering

So I have worked a few different jobs now in my college career and I will write a different blog post talking about each of them. My first job, and the one I want to talk about today, was with the catering department on campus. I worked for them for two school years and two summers. It was not a fun job, quite frankly it was a really sucky job. But what can you do when you are a college student desperate for a job?

But this is a series about being spiritual and practicing orthodox faith while in school so why talk about a job? For one thing my first boss(we went through a lot of bosses and supervisors) found out I was an orthodox christian and asked me lots of questions about it. He had been learning about it from a class that he was taking at the university and was excited to me a practitioner. I lived out my faith through the job by answering his questions.

I know also that I had questions from co-workers, mostly along the lines of "what is that?" and "I have never heard of that?". Even in the sucky food service job that I worked through college I was able to share my faith. I am not one to just go about announcing my faith but when I asked I answer. I am a more "actions speak louder than words" and I hope that how I treated my co-workers and performed my job was able to speak about my faith.

Much love

Spiritual While in School: Let us Attend

My parish decorated for Palm Sunday

As you may have guessed this post is about church service attendance. It is the most important thing that you can do. Through attending church we are spiritually fed by the service and by partaking in communion. It is way to set aside time to participate in prayer and worship. Attending church can also be beneficial for destressing. It is something we are familiar with and know the rhythm of the service. It can be a time to clear our minds from our worldly cares and focus on the heavenly world.

Make a commitment to Sunday morning liturgy and strive to attend that the most. Vespers and an occasional evening service are good to attend as well once in a while. For Holy Week there are so many services but not everyone can always make it to all of them. I try to aim for all the evening services prioritizing holy Unction and my personal favorites. Often when I know holy week is coming I try to get ahead on some of my school work that I can so that I am not stressed about school while trying to attend services. When I was working for a particular catering job, I would request the evenings after 5pm off for religious reasons. Because the schedule changed form week to week I just had to give far enough notice in advance.

I understand the struggles of attending church there have been many times when I have not attended because a final project was due or finals were coming up. I have also not attended church because of work. I worked a for catering for 2 of my college years and if I worked a 7 hour shift on Saturday I would come home exhausted and none of my homework for Monday done. I didn't go to church the next day unless it was a feast day. I have one particular summer memory of working a 50 hour work week in food service and that Sunday being my first day off and I just needed to sleep. I wish I had been better about church attendance but it is the past and I know I can only go forward and keep working on it.

Much love

Orthodox Christians in College: Spiritual While in School

I am now entering my senior year at university and graduation is impending on the horizon. I have been an orthodox christian now since I was 14 and it is coming up on my(and my family's) seventh anniversary of our chrismation. It has been great to go through college and while I am thrilled and ready to be graduating I am also going to miss it.

There are some things that I wish I had know, or had a resource for as a college student and an orthodox christian. I wish someone had been able to tell me how to practice faith while also living the busy life of a student. Perhaps someone did try to tell me and I just didn't listen carefully. I have decided that I would like to to a post series on how I have struggled to maintain my practice of my faith through my college career and still struggle to do as graduation comes ever nearer. I expect some posts will describe particular things I have done, and some posts may talk about experiences. I would also like to be honest about my own struggles and failings because this is hard and not easy to do.

I will be speaking from my particular experience of college that I know may not match all persons. I lived at home with my parents while attending a private lutheran university and that impacted how I was able to attend church. For one thing I didn't have to find a new parish and for another I was able to stay connected to my family. Some of what I have done through my college experience for my faith may not be applicable to someone who is living in a dorm, but I do hope that some of it is.

I hope that someone will benefit from this series and grow. Knowing that other people struggle the same as you do I know can be helpful to just know.

I am very blessed to attend a school where Abbot Tryphon has visited regularly. :) This is from a couple years ago when I got him to take a picture with me.

Much love

Historic Day

I feel is would be remiss of me to not post about the Supreme Court decision on gay marriage. It made me so happy to open my facebook and see all the posts. I don't think I can put it into words. Now there are equal marriage rights for all.

I know a lot of religious people are upset about it. However, I know that it is prohibited by certain groups. I think that what needs to be understood is that everyone can get a civil union that gives all equal rights, but the holy sacrament is part of the church. I believe in the separation of church and state. We do not live in a christian nation therefore rules that apply to christians to not need to be forced onto those who are not.

Overall I am so happy that the gay couples I know that now have equal rights across the US. However, as some have pointed out, LGBT+ issues are not over with this and there are many other issues. Such as job discrimination, abuse, youth homelessness, and conversion therapy that still need to be dealt with.

Jane Eyre Religion

Jane Eyre has a lot about religion in it. Charlotte Bronte's father was a minister it makes sense that religion would be in her book. But is goes much deeper than just mentioning it, and how it is practiced. When she is at Lowood school she talks a lot about religion. Lowood school is a what you might call Christian school(though by no means I would say that what they practice is Christian), because it is a 'Christian school' religion comes up a lot in this part of the book. But there are two views of Christian here that oppose each other. I would like to take a look at both of them, and compare them.

Mr. Brocklehurst has the view of God as a vengeful rathful God. He does not show love or mercy, that Christ did. He punishes without any thought to loving correction. He punishes with out any mercy, and does not talk of any forgiveness. He only talks about how we are sinful and deserve to die and are all horrible and wicked. He never talks about forgiveness. You can contrast this view with Helen Burns. She is kind and forgiving. She shows mercy, and love. She takes rebuke with a meek and quite spirit, even if it is not deserved. She listens to what they say, and things about it. She shows truly what Christianity is all about, forgiveness, mercy, love, and compassion. These two views are contrasted in the book.

I would like to talk more on this but can not think right now to do more.

Blessings

~Elizabeth